BRANDON
LIBBY
Charlie
Brandon,
A.K.A. Medicated Baby, has recently been released
from Bellevue after a lengthy, court-mandated
stay.
His
hobbies include holding his breath until he pops
a hernia, mugging sophistos, and driving everywhere
backwards. He once spent a weekend dressed in
Nike shorts, sprinting across I-95 North, with
a stopwatch in his hand and the number 7 pinned
to his back, pretending to be a lost Olympic track
entrant, desperately looking for the National
Coliseum in Sydney, Australia.
He
is currently renowned as the president of the
Paintball Militia, an activist group of abstract
artists from Montana who randomly choose cars
and houses as their "canvases" to express
their moral outrage. In an effort to repopulate
the world with people he actually likes, Mr. Libby
augmented his income by selling his DNA on ebay,
after launching his own website, frozenpop.com.
He was quoted as saying "Hey, what am I gonna
do with it?!"
He
would like to thank his 12 wives and 15 children
for never pressing charges. To the cast and crew,
"[expletive deleted]!!!".
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